HEALING ANGER IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Matthew Matt Lindgren is an Oakland therapist counselor coach who helps people manage anger to have better relationships.
- Learn to manage anger at work and at home
- Feel happy, confident, and successful
- Grow closer to your family and partner
Please Note: Matthew Matt Lindgren does not treat people for anger who have perpetrated domestic violence or who are mandated by Court order to attend therapy.
ANGER IS INTOXICATING
Anger is powerful. It can blow through obstructions and get things done. Anger offers tremendous energy to your body to accomplish challenging tasks. Anger often feels amazing. In the rush of anger, your body produces adrenaline and mix of chemicals that can help you feel superhuman. Anger can be empowering. It can be wonderful to feel so completely in the right and to fight for your cause.
ANGER HAS A PURPOSE
All of our emotional responses evolved over millions of years in order to help us in particular situations. Anger helps us in situations where it's appropriate to defend ourselves or the ones we love from harm, and in this sense, it is truly a gift. Without anger, we wouldn't have things like Civil Rights Movement of 60s. Without anger, it would be easy for us and those we love to be swept aside and treated poorly. Anger is apparent in the acts of moral outrage and courage that our leaders and members of law enforcment perform for the good of us all.
ANGER FEELS SAFE
For many men, anger is the only acceptable form of emotional expression. Traditional cultural values, shared by both men and women, don't allow men to show emotions such as fear or sadness at the risk of appearing weak, vulnerable, or at worst, feminine. As a result, anger becomes a "one size fits all" response that is a far safer bet in many social situations.
ANGER HAS A DARK SIDE
Of course, anger can cause problems, or you wouldn't be reading this. When we're angry, we often do and say things we later regret. We can hurt other people, especially those we love. Anger can cause us to feel incredible shame. It can be very easy to go too far and harm others. Therapists say that someone is "flooded" when he is in an overwhelming emotional state when it becomes very easy to lose control of anger. You can become flooded very easily and not even be aware of it.
Anger can make you say and do horrible things, and can cause harm to the people you love most.
YOU CAN MANAGE ANGER WELL AND STILL BE EFFECTIVE
Some people think that learning to manage your anger means that you'll lose or give up an important part of who you are. Nothing could be further from the truth. Managing your anger means having the freedom to choose to use the power of anger in the best possible way, instead of feeling hopelessly condemned to compulsively act it out all the time. When you learn to tolerate your anger and feel it's true power, you will have the capacity to use this part of yourself in profoundly positive ways.
MATTHEW LINDGREN WOULD LIKE TO HELP
Matthew Matt Lindgren has helped many people like yourself learn to manage and understand their anger in order to heal and grow. He's a California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT).